Thursday, November 12, 2009

Insulting my Facebook Friends... Part 1

I've decided to have a bit of fun on Facebook at my friends expense, of course. Using Wowbagger, the Infinitely Prolonged as my muse, I've decided to insult all of my Facebook friends...... alphabetically.

I started off a bit slow, but I think I'm getting the hang of it now.

This is part 1

Scott Sullivan has decided to insult each and every one of my wonderful friends.... Alphabetically...

Andrea D smells of cabbage. There, take that sweetie.

Andrea W has defective lips.

AnneMarie makes substandard pies... take that dear...

Anya has been known to soil the Batmobile

Brian is not a well respected goat herder

Briant has been known to choke on vomit... not necessarily his own.

Bridget, Your mother is an hamster and your father smells of elderberries!

Bruce Lee Jr. loves midget porn.

Carla clearly has insane friends.

Cat marches to the beat of a distant plumber.

Charlene causes temporary blindness when taken in small doses.

Chris C. piss off, you hog humping rectum head.

Colleen, bite me, you life sucking putrid tramp.

Corinne, you porn star wanna-be, minni Gianna, butt licking floozy.... and your insult is... you stink.

Courtney, you will be insulted in the form of a Haiku...
Wrapped in a snuggie:
The snow is fast approaching:
You, a filthy whore:

Cybele, You cold hearted, fashion challenged, vacillating tramp. Have a nice day.

Dan D, Go take a flying leap you vomitous mass of puss filled monkey spunk.

Dan M, may your pets conspire to eat you and your family as you sleep, you sad excuse for a pimp daddy.

Darlene, you make me sick, you amazonian, vermin infested, freakshow floozy... see you soon.

Dave K, You suck, A Rod sucks, Jeeter sucks, Steinbrenner sucks, The Yankees suck.... and you suck once again.

Dave L, you are a festering boil on the ass of humanity. Just like the Yankees...

Dave M, you turd like, scrawny Mick Jagger wanna be, smelly crotched dick.

Deb M, I'll be using the random zombie insult generator on you, you stupid, bumwipe, pukestick.... braaaaaaaaaaaiiinnnsssssssss!!!!!!

Lots of people ask me how I could possibly insult such a nice girl like Deb S..... well, like this... You vapid shrew, may the fleas of a thousand mountain goats infest your crotch.

I do not like Denise Phelan, I do not like her in a can, I do not like her in a boat, I do not like her with a goat. I do not like Denise Phelan, I do not like her Scott I am.

Denise W, "[Thine] breath stinks with eating toasted cheese." Shakespeare from: Henry VI, part 2

Donna, may you be eaten alive by zombie midgets with chainsaws.

Earl kicks puppies and kittens when nobody is looking.

Ellen, you vacuous shrew... may your face catch fire and be extinguished with a hammer.... you slut.

Erin, may you be violated a thousand times by Abe Vigoda, you hoe.

Ferval is an alias!!!! he is actually Dr. Zaius - Orangutan and one of the leading council members. He holds the official title of "Keeper of the Faith" and appears to believe that the only good human is a castrated and brain damaged one. Shaving your hair off isn't fooling anyone you damn dirty ape!!!


cbullitt said...

Glad I don't know you. Thorough job.

Then again, you blind fondler of the wrong parts, you've missed another of my oh so subtle clues that's been in your sidebar for five hours.

Sully said...

I didn't miss it, I just didn't have time earlier to comment.... you asshole.

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